The fear of what "could have" happened

So I have been doing research since I got home from work, because Ryder is still not himself. Since having a double ear infection over christmas he has been sick with colds, which finally cleared, but he developed an extremely strange rash on his forhead Friday morning after a play date. It is swollen, oozing, and could just be eczema, I thought maybe he reacted to the smell of the laundry soap from our visitors clothes or the dog hair they may have tracked in with them. Of course I work straight though until Thursday so unless I call in sick, again, I cant get him seen. He is moody, cranky, constanly scratching even though he shouldnt be itchy, cries for no reason for long periods of time, wants to cuddle all the time, and has had a fever on and off for 2 weeks.

During my research, and previously in an article I read last night, I have become aware that children who have asthma or other breathing issues should not have the MMR vaccine.I read at another source that if you are taking any immune suppressing drugs, such as a steroid like flovent that Ryder takes twice a day, you shouldnt have the vaccination. I then read in yet another article that if you have an egg allergy, and Ryder's egg allergy is extremely severe, I beleive it to be airborne, you should not have the vaccination. Well, Ryder had the shot when he turned 12 months, and he had a horrific reaction- Crying, rash, diarrea,fever for over a month!I have not given him a single immunizaton since that day, and realising the severe life threatening reaction he could have to eggs, I am so thankful I havent. But even without the egg allergy, Ryder's doctors were well aware of his asthma, and the fact that he is on flovent 2 x a day, and yet they still gave him the vaccination, even with all of my questions and concerns about his allergies. I was asking questions, but I guess just not the right ones.
When I took Ryder to sick kids in the fall, the doctor there was pleasant, asked me alot about him, and answered my questions. When he heard I hadnt given him the H1N1 vaccine he asked why. I explained about the egg allergy and that my dad ate eggs, then half an hour later kissed Ryder's neck, and he was covered in hives and screaming within 5 minutes. The doctor continued to tell me all of the advantages of the vaccine, and that Ryder should still have it. Thinking back now about his insistence, and the other doctors I have dealt with and their insistance to vaccinate when Ryder has such severe, life threatening allergies, I am confident it is all about money. Why else wouldnt they take his life more seriously? I know that doctors get paid by prescription by the pharmacutical companies, and I know that, even though Ryder has no symptoms of asthma, and I have never really seen any, they insist he stays on these expensive, inhaled steroids!
I am furious! I am disappointed, and saddened that I can't trust any doctor I know. The ones who know how sick Ryder is, and could become, are the ones risking his life to make a buck. I knew it happened, but didnt realise it was happening to me. I am tearful and scared about what could have happened before I knew what questions to ask. I could have killed my son because I didnt know better, and the doctors who should, or do, would have let me.